Filed under: Rants and Raves
I am always meaning to keep up with this blog. It kind of reminds me of how I felt about my journal because until recently I never kept up with that either. The secret to my journaling success is that I never gave up on the hope that I would eventually write in it almost every day. And now I am. So maybe the same pattern will apply.
I think that I am that kind of person. I have these grandiose ideas and I am going to do it and I am going to be the best but I never allot the time that would be required to be the best. The trick that I have learned is that if it is actually worth the time and effort I always come back to it.
That is how I feel about writing in general. I loved to write when I was younger. I remember in preschool I used to tell myself stories while the other children napped because I couldn’t fall asleep. My passion grew until I was 10, when I wrote a newspaper for my grade. I put the whole thing together with cross word puzzles and a vote on what the most popular beanie baby was. But the pièce de résistance of the paper was the interview that I had done with the principal. When I brought the paper into school (I had made 64 copies for everyone in my class) I couldn’t wait to hand it out. My teacher had made me wait until after recess because the principal had wanted to look at it before it was given out. As I happily bounced through the doors of my class room, my fingers ready to grab the towering stacks of paper, my teacher parked herself between me and the stack. Before a word passed either of our lips she took one of the papers from the stack and ripped it in half right in front of me. She continued ripping the papers in half as I begged her to stop. She bent down so that her face was close to mine and she screamed at me that the principle was furious with me. (Apparently I had misquoted the principle because when I asked her the hard hitting journalistic question which grade is your favorite: she responded the third grade because they are so “sassy” well I had put prissy. I had written down prissy. And was prissy really all that bad that she had to rip up my hard work in front of my entire class with everyone looking at me eyes wide and mouths dropped. *you can tell I have really let go of this*) Anyway the screaming went on for at least twenty papers and from five on hot tears were streaming down my face. I will never forget her saggy cheeks wagging at me as she fervently shook her head and scolded me. She then sent me immediately down to the principal’s office. I will never forget how scared I was as I sobbed my way down the stairs to the principal’s office I thought for sure I was getting suspended. When the principal saw me come through the doors of her office crying she hugged me and told me everything was going to be alright. But for days after that I couldn’t speak about it. I was sick thinking that my parents would find out and ground me forever.
Looking back on it obviously that teacher was nuts but it stopped me from writing for six years. I still wrote in a journal but I had no hopes of being a writer. I dabbled with it again by writing a novel based off my friends and our lives. We all loved it but that was because we were the main characters. Then as I applyied to community college I thought why don’t I try writing again I have nothing to lose and it was the best thing I have ever done for myself.
I may never be the best at anything but I have found what I am passionate about trying for.
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